Joy and Loss in Unprecedented Times

We are living in an unprecedented time, and since there is no “blueprint” for how to live and work through an extended period of physical distancing, it makes it difficult to orient life – we don’t even know how long we’ll be physically distancing.  We are having new conversations politically, and as a society, that point to the level of impact this virus will have.  Conversations that bring home the need to stay the course, while accepting that even with these drastic measures there are many lives that will be touched, and much is still unknown

...it is a bit of a mind-boggle to see things progressing, while many pieces of life are standing completely still.

This time last year my family was immersed in hockey play-offs and planning team wind-up parties.  I am sad that my son has not had the chance to say good-bye to team mates he is unlikely to be playing with again next year.  He is complaining because all the runners that fit him are at school, making do with boots and sandals now that the weather is nicer.  These are small, insignificant, sacrifices but they do have an impact, either through inconvenience, uncertainty or a lack of celebration, lack of closure.  Life moves on.  Babies are born, nature is changing seasons – it is a bit of a mind-boggle to see things progressing, while many pieces of life are standing completely still. 

..it’s healthy to mourn the loss that this circumstance has brought...it’s also healthy to find joy during this time...

And it’s healthy to mourn the loss that this circumstance has brought; job loss, weddings held without ceremony; birthday parties missed.  Not being able to give your parents a hug for fear of infecting them.  It’s healthy to turn away from the news, and do what you need to do to keep your spirits up.  It’s also healthy to find joy during this time, getting to the things that you haven’t had time for; time to do “nothing”, time to immerse yourself in a hobby, or parts of your work you couldn’t get to until now.  It’s healthy to be completely unproductive for defined periods of time because that is what you need, and to wear pajamas during the day because “why not”.  It’s healthy to be grateful that you don’t have to go to that event you were dreading (even when that cancelled event was someone else’s dream shattered).

Give yourself credit for being an extraordinary human at an extraordinary time...

This unprecedented circumstance will continue to produce both joy and loss, sometimes in the same moment.  It is difficult to process oscillating emotions, navigating between highs and lows, all bathed in uncertainty. You are doing it right in whatever way you are doing it.  Give yourself credit for being an extraordinary human at an extraordinary time – letting yourself feel it, as gloriously messy as that is.