Ever Cried At Work?

Photo by Kat J on Unsplash

It’s deeply uncomfortable and takes on a life of it’s own with your manager and peers; sometimes expressed as care and concern for you and/or subtle judgment.  This is an experience many of us can relate to; not to say that we shouldn’t ever cry at work; tears (of happiness or sadness) may always be a part of something you care deeply about (including work) – it’s about having the option to choose if you want to cry about something or not (rather than it just happening to you).  Frustration at work is common, but when it goes on unchecked it backs-up on you emotionally and makes itself known in ways you did not intend.  No one likes to lose their temper at work, or cry, or feel the urge to disappear for a few hours because everything became too much.  Frustration leads to overwhelm and when we ignore the signs that things are becoming overwhelming we leave ourselves at risk of having an awkward and ill-timed emotional demonstration at work.
 
Frustration is a sign of unhealthy compromise coupled with unmet needs.  Maybe your budget just got slashed (but expectations on what you will deliver didn’t).  Maybe your hours of work have crept up to unsustainable levels (with no light at the end of the tunnel to signal the end of the long hours is near).  Perhaps you expressed your concerns or needs to your manager and had them fall on deaf ears (no one else seems to care or to be impacted, except you).  Whatever is causing you deep frustration, the warning signs come in advance to help you get in touch with what needs to change to allow your well-being to remain in tact. These warning signs come in many varieties and strengths.  From unrelenting heartburn, sleeplessness or other symptoms that can impact your health (in the long term) combined with a real lack of motivation to go into work (possibly even dread).  If left unchecked whatever you are compromising or missing in your working life will show up emotionally when you least expect it.  Pay attention to the signs; let them help you to figure out what is not working for you.
 
While having conversations with your employer about changes that would reduce/eliminate your unhealthy compromise and address your needs (or unanswered concerns) can feel incredibly vulnerable, it is the only way to tackle your frustrations.  Waiting for your boss or organization to “get it” only gives you one more thing to be frustrated about (HINT:  if they “got it” you wouldn’t be in this situation in the first place).  If you want your employer to help you, you have to help him/her understand what you are experiencing, and open the door to dialogue, finding a compromise that you can both live with.  Not everything is possible (i.e. you can’t work 20 hours a week and get paid for 40), but small, meaningful changes can make the difference between spontaneous tears of frustration and figuring out how to make it work at work with your well-being (and self-esteem) intact.