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5 Ways t0 Say No at Work

8/10/2021

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Your time and needs are important. So is learning to advocate for them through voicing what is, and is not, possible during busy periods in your work and life. 
 
Balancing saying “yes” and “no” is all about helping others understand you care but have commitments you’ve made that are also important (which includes your own well-being).
 
Here are 5 ways to say “no” without making a “career limiting” move.

  • Know what saying “yes” will cost.  Doing things is a comfort zone, that’s why often those who are the busiest tend to take on more. Being busy, being needed, can feel good even if it makes life difficult.  Check in, what compels you to say “yes”? What need of yours is being met by saying “yes”? Which of your needs are you ignoring by taking more on? Is saying “yes” an impulse, or a well thought out response?  Only one will ensure you can get it all done meeting everyone’s expectations.

  • Say “yes” to the need but “no” to the work.  You can say “yes” to someone else’s need (your boss, a co-worker, or a family member) while saying “no” to taking on more work. Begin by acknowledging this other person’s need and its importance, then contextualize why taking on this work now isn’t going to get them the results they are looking for. “This is such a good initiative, and I would like to help. Right now, I am on a tight deadline to complete a key priority, and I can’t do justice to your request. Can this wait until next week/month when I will have the time it needs?”

  • Buy yourself some time. You can also ask for time before committing to a request, especially if your gut is saying “No, no, no, no NOOOOO.” “I hear your need for an extra set of hands on this, and I am appreciative that you thought of me as the right person for it, but I am currently tasked with items that have competing deadlines and will need to see if adding this work is feasible, as I don’t want to commit and not deliver. Can I get back to you tomorrow?” You may want to help, or you may already know there is no way to do this new work. In asking for more time, it gives both you and the person making the request the space to consider options, which may include a compromise on their deadline or the scope of work you take on. You may also find when you go back to let them know what’s feasible, they have another solution that doesn’t mean more work for you.

  • Say “yes” with a price. Do the math; look at the work you are accountable for delivering.  Estimate the hours it will realistically take to complete (best guess).  Next, calculate the number of work hours you have in the period you need to complete the work (i.e., a week, or a month).  Use the working hours you are paid for in that period, not the ones you “volunteer”.  Subtract from that number any statutory holidays, outside appointments or vacation time you know is booked.  Now, subtract from that total the number of hours you are in meetings or are already committed to something else at work.  That is your “real” number of hours available to work.  Take the number of hours needed to deliver your work minus the number of hours you have to work on those things.  Do the math because it makes possible a new conversation about which items matter at work, and which ones can wait. “I can do that for you no problem, but it will mean a delay on the deliverables for the project you requested.  Does that work for you?”

  • Say “no” to the request, not the person.  By using the strategies above you will ensure whoever has asked for your time and assistance feels heard and valued, which means when you do say no they will understand you are saying "no" to the work and not to them personally.  This is one of the biggest hurdles to saying “no” for many professionals, it can be misinterpreted as personal.  Rather than caving, say “no” for the right reasons in the right ways and you’ll keep both your work schedule and your relationships healthy. “I understand what you need and if I could accommodate your request I would.  Right now, I am on a tight deadline which means committing something to you in the same timeframe would be irresponsible.  Have you considered asking for an extension [asking X to help, etc.]?" 
 
It’s OK to say “no” to work because you need to be done work on time or to meet your own needs and commitments. What you don’t have to do is share your personal reasons for saying “no” to work. 
 
If you have already framed your “no” by referencing current workload, priorities, and deadlines, then let that stand as your reason for not taking on more work. They don’t need to know it’s because you’ve planned a well-deserved and relaxing night off.
Struggling to say "No" at work?  I have strategies that make this easy and effective without the "career limiting" move.
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