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QUESTION

FIVE

I’ll stop what I am doing at work to help someone else, even when there is no direct benefit to me.

Nope...

Emma was stuck.  She couldn’t get signed on to the new portal and she was working against a deadline.  She pinged Dan, a more senior member of their team, and asked for help.  Dan pretended he didn’t get the message (even though Emma could see the green dot that confirmed Dan was online – she thought “What a pr*ck!”).  Dan had a deadline of his own he was working towards and didn’t feel inclined to help someone else.
 
  • Blind Spot:  Helping others is a way to build important social currency, currency you might just need later on.
  • Hidden Habit:  Not caring enough about others to help them out when there is no direct benefit to you.

When it’s safe…         

Emma was stuck.  She couldn’t get signed on to the new portal and she was working against a deadline.  She pinged Dan, a more senior member of their team, and asked for help.  Dan thought about pretending he didn’t get the message (even though he knew Emma could see the green dot that confirmed he was online).  Dan pinged back to let Emma know that he couldn’t help and she’d have to call IT (he didn’t want to have to walk her through all that, and besides he had a deadline of his own to worry about!).
 
  • Blind Spot: “Checking the box” on being helpful can be as bad an experience for the other person as being ignored …and they may never forget how you may them feel.
  • Hidden Habit:  Trying to look helpful, but having no intention to actually be helpful.

For some things...

Emma was stuck.  She couldn’t get signed on to the new portal and she was working against a deadline.  She pinged Dan, a more senior member of their team, and asked for help.  Dan liked Emma as a colleague and went back and forth with her via message to help her get logged on while he was also trying to get through the work needed to meet his deadline.  It took far longer than he thought it would, but he stuck with it until she could sign on.  In the end both he and Emma needed to work late to get their deadlines met.
 
  • Blind Spot:  Not being realistic about the “cost” of multi-tasking (for you and others).
  • Hidden Habit:  The belief that you can do it all well and ignoring results that say otherwise, so no learning takes place over time (leaving you at risk of it sabotaging your work again in the future).

A lot...

Emma was stuck.  She couldn’t get signed on to the new portal and she was working against a deadline.  She pinged Dan, a more senior member of their team, and asked for help.  Dan liked Emma as a colleague and went back and forth with her via message at the start, but after a while he realized how frustrated she was getting because of her big deadline and hopped on a video conference with her where they could share their screens and he could support what she needed more quickly.  It meant Dan had to work a bit later, but seeing the relief on Emma’s face and knowing he’d made a difference in her work was worth it.
 
  • Blind Spot:  Your intention is true, which is wonderful.  Make sure to add the step of proactively considering the best approach using all the tools available to you.
  • Hidden Habit:  Getting caught up in the flow and not pulling yourself out to look at things objectively so you can shift or pivot as needed to do the right things, in the right way, for the right reason.

Yes, always!

Emma was stuck.  She couldn’t get signed on to the new portal and she was working against a deadline.  She pinged Dan, a more senior member of their team, and asked for help.  Dan had just been through this himself, and recognized the portal was not intuitive.  He’d had to call IT for help to get logged on.  On his own time, he took screen shots and wrote out the instructions so if others had the same problems, he could share what worked.  Dan shared his instructions with Emma, who then suggested he distribute them to the team, so he did (receiving gratitude from many others). Plus, he was able to keep working and finish up without working late (and so did Emma).  Months later Dan’s manager included this example in his performance review, pointing to Dan’s readiness for promotion.
 
  • Blind Spot:  You are a helpful hero!  You see how something may be beneficial to everyone and take the right steps to get there – don’t be shy, when you develop tools and tricks to cope at work, share them proactively (these are solid value-add).
  • Hidden Habit:  While it feels good to do this for a difficult process or something new, don’t fall into the trap of becoming the “Rescuer”; continue to balance your efforts with what makes the most strategic sense in your work and for your team.
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  • Work With Carleen
    • About Carleen
    • Career Strategy Session >
      • Get The Most Out Of Your Career Strategy Session
    • Podcasts
    • Coaching Programs >
      • Lead with Impact
      • Career Impact
      • Purpose to Impact
      • Recognize Your Leadership Potential >
        • Welcome to Recognizing Your Leadership Potential
      • Realize Your High Potential
      • The Art of Influence at Work
      • Your Time By Design
      • Assessment
    • Book Me To Speak >
      • Persuasive at Work
      • Workshops That Work >
        • Getting Hybrid Right
        • Leading a Hybrid Team Workshop
        • Communicating Comfortably in a Hybrid Setting Workshop
        • Finding Your Leadership Compass Hybrid Teams Workshop
        • Communicating Comfortably in a Virtual Setting Workshop
        • Leading in Ambiguity Workshop
        • Accomplishing Work Through Others Workshop
        • My Values Driven Workplace Workshop
        • Working Successfully From Home Workshop
        • Working Resilience
        • The Many Faces of Unconscious Bias Workshop
        • Building A Culture of Trust Workshop
        • Finding Your Leadership Compass Workshop
        • Foundational Conversations Workshop
        • Conscious Conversations Workshop
        • Purpose Driven Feedback Workshop
        • Dynamic Team Communication Workshop
    • Awards
  • Client Stories
  • Blog
  • Testimonials
  • Free Resources
    • Summer Serenity Inspiration Guide
    • Working Life Wellbeing Assessment
    • Hidden Habits Holding You Back
    • Secrets to Boost Your Job Security
    • Working Life Serenity
    • Virtual Influence
    • Hello Monday Videos
    • Career Resources
    • Life Practices >
      • I Feel Angry
      • I Feel Stuck
      • I Am Overwhelmed
      • I Need Self-Compassion
      • Emotions At Work
      • Mindfulness
      • Triggers At Work
      • Naming Emotions
      • I Feel Frustrated
    • Balancing Time Workbook
    • Working Life Persona Quiz
    • Career Health Quiz
    • Healthy Boundaries Quiz
  • Referral Partners
  • Connect
  • Subscribe
  • The Career Edit