“Belonging starts with self-acceptance. Your level of belonging, in fact, can never be greater than your level of self-acceptance…”
- Brené Brown
As an Observer you invest energy and time connecting to deep meaning, both in your work and with your colleagues. Getting at the marrow of both projects and people really unlocks your productivity. You are quick to spot when something is missing (in a plan or a conversation) and push to address it, giving voice to your deep intuition. Your expressive nature may get called out…you can put the drama in “Drama Lama”!
Colleagues may not understand your sensitivity or intensity. They’re not privy to the internal kaleidoscope of emotions you live with everyday. You are looking for ways to believe in yourself and use your gifts. When recognition doesn’t come, you work harder to get it; there is no room for compromise, acceptance means everything. When others miss out on the usefulness of your contributions or your camaraderie you may become smug and unforgiving (“It sucks to be you!” Whoops. Inside voice!).
When hurt comes home with you it may show up as moodiness, becoming emotional about everyday things or being temperamental in interactions with loved ones. Holding emotional pain you may be demanding and arrogant, or darkly pessimistic about ever being received for the gifts you want to share with the world.
Free Your Potential...
It is hard feeling like a lobster without its shell, especially at work. Putting your heart and soul into your job, showing up to the fullest each day is how you express your values…and it hurts when others do not meet you as fully in this place of value as you want (it’s so tiring!). But that doesn’t mean you should get out your measuring stick and start comparing yourself to others, you never come out ahead (just as comparing others to your values means they never come out ahead).
Put down your measuring stick (yup, I saw you reach for it); when you are busy comparing and measuring at work you turn away from your potential, sabotaging what you really want – to be genuinely connected to peers, pursuing the things that matter together. Do you think others will trust and respect you if you are on the edge of telling them what you really think (or withdrawing from them so you don’t)? Those frustrations point to a need - give yourself a moment to breathe. Your feelings are stuck in a tunnel with no air; breathe and discover all that is here for you (crystal balls do not exist, no one accurately predicts the future). Wherever something is missing you’ll find opportunity.
Look for the possibilities present in each moment. You may not be exactly where you want to be in all aspects of your work, but you are getting there (just try and stop you!). Know that even if things aren’t ideal right now possibilities are ever-present, especially for someone with your deep commitment to what holds meaning. Connecting to others, seeing what is possible as well as meaningful will give you what you need to experience consistent well being in your working life.