I’ve had a challenging week at work (and it won’t be my last).  There is a lot that went really well, and there are some important things that didn’t, many of which were out of my control.  At times it made me feel like just going back to bed.  Can you relate?
 
Of course, that’s when you dig deep, remembering why you do what you do and how it makes a meaningful difference in the world (you know, beyond the paycheck...).  Resilience is so important at work; it is the backbone of a successful career.  Yet sometimes there is little energy left to stay positive, or objective.  It’s tempting to just wallow, but as good as that feels in the moment, wallowing can become a habit that doesn’t support your great potential at work.
 
So, what should you do when you know you need to find it in yourself to keep going with a good attitude?  Here are 5 key emotional intelligence strategies you can use to dig deep and bring more resilience to your work and career.

• Connect to your motivations.  You likely try to keep your emotions out of work, but the ones you need to keep in are the ones connected to your values, sense of purpose and professional passion.  No one keeps getting out of bed to do something every day they don’t care about, so when you need a resilience boost, give yourself 10 minutes to reflect on what you care about in your work; make a list and let yourself feel how that fuels your work and career.
• Connect to your career, emotionally.  Most professionals don’t have a direct connection to seeing (or hearing) about how their work makes a difference.  If you don’t know how what you do makes a meaningful difference you will run out of the emotional gas you need to keep doing it.  Trace your work back, how does it contribute to your organization and/or to others?  Your work needs to source you, not just use you up.  That is only possible when you let what you do touch you.  You’re dedicated and amazing at what you do – feel that.
• Connect to your future.  Where is your career taking you?  A career can quickly feel like a life sentence if there isn’t a bigger picture or plan that you’re invested in.  Whether your career aspirations are giving back, climbing up, retiring young or funding a dream lifestyle it helps to know where you’re going and how that fits in with your personal life plan.  
• Connect to other professionals.  Humans are geared for connection – we suffer when we’re isolated and alone.  If you’re finding it hard to overcome setbacks at work you may need to reach out and connect with loved ones, or professional contacts. Choose people who can relate to what you are experiencing and empathize with you.  You are not alone and it’s OK to reach out for moral support – we all need it, so do it.  Connect with warm-hearted people who support you (and whom you would support in return).
• Connect to your physical wellbeing.  As the saying goes, you can’t pour from an empty cup.  Pay attention to your overall health and mental wellbeing, take time off when you’re ill.  Make time for play, movement, and sleep.  If you don’t take time for your health, you’ll be forced to make time for your illness – choose which best works for your career and bright future.

 
Challenges at work are there for a reason – they grow you, making you stronger and better at what you do.  They are also exasperating and exhausting. So, when you’ve hit a wall at work, remember this is just a chapter in your story – it’s not the whole book.  Give yourself the grace you need to re-group and replenish yourself and, when you're ready, get back out there.
 
You’ve survived 100% of your worst days, you’ve got this one too.

The other day I experienced a beautiful moment of serenity at work, and it felt both reassuring and energizing.  I just love those moments. Then I realized it had been a while since I’d spontaneously had that feeling at work, and it made me very curious:  Why don’t I have access to feelings of serenity at work more often? I love what I do for a living.
 
As it turns out, even when you love your job, this is normal.  There will always be aspects of any role that don’t contribute to your serenity, but that doesn’t always mean your work is negatively impacting your well-being.  There are the parts of all jobs that require focus, concentration and have an element of risk associated with them that increases your stress level.  Like learning something new through making a mistake or having to do something you don’t enjoy (but need to do well, like having a difficult conversation with your boss to keep your work/life boundaries sacred).   
 
It’s very much an 80/20 rule when it comes to work enjoyment; if 80% of the job challenges you (in a good way) and makes you feel achievement and/or contentment, you are doing well.  The other 20%?  That is the “normal” amount of stress and bother you can expect in any job (even your dream job).  
 
Right now, you may feel your job is more than 20% stress and bother, and you may be right.  Looking into what is working in your role today, and what is not, is very important because both you and your job are evolving, which means something that gave you contentment in the past might just be a giant pain in your butt today (and part of the 20%).
 
The 80% is what can lift you out of a spiral of stress and discontentment when you do have a great fit with your work and organization.  And if you know you are not in the right job, or working for the right employer, it’s the part you need to plan for in any future career moves you want to make.
 
Whether your job is 80/20, or more like 40/60 right now, there are some things you can do to enjoy more of what’s there to love, helping you to have more of those moments of serenity at work (or get through today while you look for what’s next).

• Let your work touch you.  Whether you enjoy what you are doing immensely, or not at all, you are likely “in it to win it”, meaning you show up and give it your best.  That also means your work has value. How does your work make a difference?  Even if your boss can’t see it, someone is benefitting from what you do (why else would you be getting paid to do this work?).  Let your work touch you – you both have value.
• Think big picture.  Whether you enjoy what you do today or not, all the expertise and experience you gain in a role, from task-oriented items to growing insight in an industry, supports your career.  What is this work giving you that you can leverage in future roles (either at this organization or the next)?  Take comfort that the time you spend in the workforce is like equity in a home, it grows and is there to use in new and different ways.  
• Invest in you.  Continuing with the “career as home equity” example, just as investing in improvements to your home increases its value, growing your skills through professional development is also a great way to make yourself more marketable and opens new opportunities that bring on career satisfaction.  Whether your employer will support your professional development, or you are paying for it yourself, when it furthers your professional expertise, you’ll see a strong return on your investment (and that lends itself to a lot of serenity).   
• Tweak your environment. Many people make do with their working environment, but it is something that can cause low-grade dissatisfaction each day (you’re there 8-10 hours a day, your desk should be a nice place to spend time). From tidying it up, to getting an ergonomic assessment done to ensure your being kind to your body, there is much here you can do to make sure this environment reminds you how valuable you are.
• Find a work friend, mentor, or a coach.  Work friends, mentors and coaches are very different things, but all can have a positive impact on your working life, providing insight and objectivity that empower you to make the best decisions for your work and career.  Whether you are looking for support to change jobs, or just someone with whom you can spit ball ideas, having professional connections that empower you at work creates a lot more enjoyment throughout the workday.
• Non-toxic gratitude.  Bet you didn’t know there was such a thing as toxic gratitude – it’s when you “should” feel thankful for something, but it only makes you feel like a bad human because you’re not.  Life is hard and there are going to be days when you just don’t have it in you to be grateful for something.  Look for the little things that matter, like the crayoned note from your kids, or the sunlight in the window.  Give yourself permission to enjoy this moment and just breathe.  Put all your cares and worries down for a few minutes and get back in touch with yourself.  Even a few minutes will do more than you know to re-fuel you at work and make being there a better experience (on a good day or a bad one).

 
Serenity is always there as a baseline for you, but only when you can acknowledge the effort you put into your work matters to you.  It’s up to each of us to clear a path to feel more of those serene moments in our work, not all the time, but more consistently.

I’ve written a few resignation letters in my time; some with unbridled joy and some with complete uncertainty I was making the right move.  It’s a big decision.
 
“The Great Resignation” is a real thing.  Right now, in North America, there is a high degree of unemployment AND a labour shortage – something you don’t normally see happen at the same point in time.  Thanks to the pandemic professionals have been given the time and occasion to re-evaluate how well their current work is working for them.  Many jobs and employers have come up short of expectations.
 
It’s natural (and healthy) to periodically look at where you are in your career so you can course correct.  Early in your career you likely didn’t have a plan (other than to get a job, in your field if possible). From there you may have followed a path of happy coincidence, moving to jobs that worked well for you, climbing the corporate ladder, and feeling good about your career progression.  Unusual and disruptive events in life do make us beautiful humans reflect; is this why I got into this work?  Is this enough for me?  Am I living up to my potential? Am I doing the kind of work I find meaningful?  These are all strong questions to consider in your career.
 
For some, the pandemic was a harsh mirror that reflected a life that was spending too much time working and not enough time on the things that really mattered. If you’re one of the many professionals who’s asking yourself if this is all there is in your life and career, here are some critical things to do before you write that resignation letter.

• Use your reflections to fuel your next move.  So, you have more to give, and you want more meaning in your work and career. Make a list of what you are specifically stepping out of (work you really don’t want to do anymore) and what you want to do more of (this could be work you do today, or work you aspire to do and haven’t had the chance to yet).  The more specific you can be the better, because this will help ensure you don’t drop from the “frying pan and into the fire”.

• Where does the work you want “live”?  If your current employer doesn’t have it, who does?  Do the research, follow companies you’re interested in on LinkedIn, Twitter, etc.  See if the work they are involve in is work you want to do.  Find out what kind of employer they are, check them out on Glass Door.  If they are publicly traded, check out their latest annual report (no point in moving to a tanking company).

• Have strong collateral.  When you’re thinking about moving jobs, your resume and professional social media profiles need to stand out.  This is more than listing your job duties (please don’t do that).  This is about capturing your achievements at work and writing them in a succinct way that intrigues your future employer, compelling them to invite you to an interview to find out more. It’s easier to do than you think (and if this has you stuck, reach out, I can help).  Updating your resume and social profiles before you quit acts as a double check on your “emotional math”, helping you feel confident about your next steps.

• Start where you work.  If you know why you want out, and you’re headed in that direction, it’s worth it to see what can change where you work today.  In some cases, professionals are looking for something that is not in their current employer’s control, a better commute.  Today’s organizations have never had to plan for a return to work after a pandemic, yours might be open to a different working arrangement that addresses your biggest pinch point. If your concerns are about other issues, having this difficult conversation could be the ticket to bringing about the kind of opportunities and changes you need to stay – but you’ll never know unless you ask.  Lastly, there may be opportunities for you in another part of your organization, don’t jump before you’re sure there is nothing left for you here.

• Amp up your networking.  The most informed way to find your next quality opportunity, is through professional networking.  If you’ve kept your network fresh over the pandemic, then you are in a good position to let others know you are looking and what you are looking for (feeding you any leads they come across).  If it’s been a while, you may need to re-build your network to start seeing the benefits.  Either way, this is hands down the best way to get quality job leads and is less soul sucking then the lottery that is applying to open job postings where you have no contacts.

 
When I’ve resigned (even when it was with unbridled joy) it wasn’t always my best move.  Objectivity plays a huge part in the success of any career move you make, qualifying what you want and realistically seeing what’s out there (and how well that will work for you).  While dream careers exist (being able to have meaningful work in your profession for an employer who respects you and invests in your potential or being able to get that kind of work elsewhere whenever you need to), perfect jobs do not.
 
When you’re considering any kind of job change, it’s important to understand what is non-negotiable for you and what you are willing to compromise to enjoy more of your work and life.  Flexibility within clear boundaries you are willing to hold is key to having your dream career.